According to the Center for the Study of Long Distance relationships, the biggest challenge facing LDR couples is “maintaining the feeling of simply being part of one another’s lives.” This is a fact that 26-year-old marketing manager Cesca Silvestre, who left a two-year LDR last year, knows all to well. She shares, “you don’t have shared experiences, shared memories, so how can you grow together?” She also explains that the 12-hour time difference was a difficult challenge to overcome. She says, “When you’re with someone, he is there for you at your happiest pr lowest moment, but in my case, when something great or bad happened, he was asleep. Suddenly, he lost his role in my life. I felt that I was single.”
There are many ways to accomplished regular communication and many couples are helped by the sheer wealth of technology available. However, sometimes a simple phone call, text message or on-line chat isn’t enough. When LDR couples communicate through the phone or the internet, the challenge is to become more expressive – and since they cannot physically show affection, they must find new and innovative ways to show how mush they care. Take graduate student Anne Elicao, 26, as an example. She and her long distance boyfriend play online games like Literati and Warship on Yahoo. “It breaks the monotony of just yapping away on the phone all the time. We play for prizes, which we can claim the next time we see each other,” she says.
LDR couples should also discuss issues as they rise and to not wait for the perfect moment. Because of separation, many couples tend to shy away from bringing up sensitive topics, but some things must be said Merchandising Manager Sophia Delgado*, 27, shares from experience, “Since we’re in an LDR, we want to deal with issues right away. We have to make the most of our time as much possible we are in good terms when we sign off.”